July 3, 2009
Good news!  Dexter is in a foster home right now, presumably wreaking havoc on someone else’s shoulder (he seems calm here, but he liked to prance around and dig his nails in). Good news!  I got a haircut, so really, you don’t have to tell me anymore.  I know, it was shaggy.  I also know that my work outfit is highly generic.  JC Penney, fools.   Bad news!  I was kinda responsible for a work accident and I feel pretty bad about it.  I was socializing one of the more nervous cats in a separate room, just petting him inside his cage with the door open, and he saw another cat who must have made fun of his momma or something, because he darted out like a freak of nature.  I tried to separate the two (luckily, the other was in his own cage, but they were still smacking at each other) but he snapped at me.  A full-time worker heard the noise and came in, and like me, tried to break it up, and she wasn’t able to pull away when Benjamin snapped at her.  Dug his teeth in, clawed up her arms, and didn’t let go for 5 seconds.  I’ve never seen a bite mark like that, and it was pretty terrifying.  Her arm was a mess, but she seemed okay… didn’t feel the need to go to the ER (at least when I last saw her).  I feel like I should get flowers or something now, because I’m rather miserable over it.  Apparently he’s not allowed to be let out at all, so I should have blocked him from seeing the other cats, but I didn’t know.  I’ve had some good luck with dealing with most of the troubled cats, and a bit of bad luck.  This is REALLY bad luck. He might have to be put down.  We’re almost entirely no-kill, but we make exceptions for animals that are too sick to live a healthy life and animals that are a danger to humans.  Keep in mind that I’ve been bitten, scratched at, clawed, and the whole deal, but nothing like this, and it’s not like Benjamin is feral.  He’s been here for at least a month and just can’t get past whatever he’s been through, still having serious issues.  All the other times I’ve seen two cats go at it, it’s usually a few smacks, some screaming, and one cat scurrying away, but this cat wanted blood. Ugh.

Good news!  Dexter is in a foster home right now, presumably wreaking havoc on someone else’s shoulder (he seems calm here, but he liked to prance around and dig his nails in).

Good news!  I got a haircut, so really, you don’t have to tell me anymore.  I know, it was shaggy.  I also know that my work outfit is highly generic.  JC Penney, fools.  

Bad news!  I was kinda responsible for a work accident and I feel pretty bad about it.  I was socializing one of the more nervous cats in a separate room, just petting him inside his cage with the door open, and he saw another cat who must have made fun of his momma or something, because he darted out like a freak of nature.  I tried to separate the two (luckily, the other was in his own cage, but they were still smacking at each other) but he snapped at me.  A full-time worker heard the noise and came in, and like me, tried to break it up, and she wasn’t able to pull away when Benjamin snapped at her.  Dug his teeth in, clawed up her arms, and didn’t let go for 5 seconds.  I’ve never seen a bite mark like that, and it was pretty terrifying.  Her arm was a mess, but she seemed okay… didn’t feel the need to go to the ER (at least when I last saw her).  I feel like I should get flowers or something now, because I’m rather miserable over it.  Apparently he’s not allowed to be let out at all, so I should have blocked him from seeing the other cats, but I didn’t know.  I’ve had some good luck with dealing with most of the troubled cats, and a bit of bad luck.  This is REALLY bad luck.

He might have to be put down.  We’re almost entirely no-kill, but we make exceptions for animals that are too sick to live a healthy life and animals that are a danger to humans.  Keep in mind that I’ve been bitten, scratched at, clawed, and the whole deal, but nothing like this, and it’s not like Benjamin is feral.  He’s been here for at least a month and just can’t get past whatever he’s been through, still having serious issues.  All the other times I’ve seen two cats go at it, it’s usually a few smacks, some screaming, and one cat scurrying away, but this cat wanted blood.

Ugh.

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funny ladies (yes. again)

unicornfandance:

so i just noticed this article on public school intelligentsia. yeah i know. welcome to the party. all the booze is gone and your parents are asleep upstairs. i should be quiet. right. actually no wait. why do you still live with your parents? i’m getting off topic.

anyway i read this article about how there are no comediennes whose ability to be funny walks that fine line between poignant and hilarious and dangerous and smart and my initial reaction was “not true” but that was because i was thinking about WRITERS (of books, songs and internet dramz) not of female figures in popular culture.

the question is asked: where is the female lenny bruce mitch hedberg etc? my friend kyle would get wasted before his sets. i knew a few people who did this. that was part of their “funny drunk guy” act. it made it funnier. and it also served to loosen the inhibitions that even a seasoned performer never really gets to shake. i have to agree with the author of this article that if a woman were to undertake similar antics, she would face concerned faces and shaking heads and questions of “are you doing ok?should you be doing this to yourself?” i wouldn’t know because i only knew dudes who did stand up back in the day.

but it begs the question: why?

My work with Punchlines has sorta put me in the position to think about this, since it’s expanded from Mitch Hedberg quotes to general stand up comedy.  Obviously, it’s much easier for me to grab small bits.  Mitch is perfect for tumblr in that respect, and Carlin also mastered the one-liner.  

I have had some trouble finding women for the platform, and it’s bothered me a bit.   Comedy Central is focused mostly on men, with Sarah Silverman being the most prominent female out there.  Chelsea Handler is the only one who comes close to having the “dangerous” cred, as far as I know, but although she talks about alcohol a bunch, she seems pretty level headed on stage.

Actually, I think the prob is a lack of prominent comediennes in general.  Look at this sausage fest.  It doesn’t make any sense.  I’ve been to maybe 10 live stand-up shows, and I don’t remember that many female stand-ups.  My last show, Bill Burr?  Bill Burr is a Bahston guy, and a very good comedian, but for his two openers, I got to see… two more Bahston guys, doing similar stuff.  One screwed the pooch on stage.  The other was great, but there was too much Yahdood for me that night (kidding, kidding… okay, half-kidding).  That show was at Caroline’s, which will have only two female headliners in the schedule for the next three months.

I don’t know if that’s how it works in general, but it seems to be a boy’s club sorta thing.  Unusual, especially since guys supposedly love funny ladies.  Crap, the women here aren’t performing live, but the writing is killin it.  So… ummm… what’s going on at the clubs?

I’m with you, Meg… confused face right here.

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Don’t get me started…
Don’t get me started…
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Someone joked that I have a man crush on this guy, as if there was something wrong with it. Don’t get me started, don’t even get me started.

Someone joked that I have a man crush on this guy, as if there was something wrong with it.

Don’t get me started, don’t even get me started.

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Olympic Belly Flop

10!

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seagull:

The Social Ride’s bellyflop competition at Barton Springs last night!  Quincy @ 3:50 really owned.  Should’ve heard that slap irl.

Keith, best ride evar.  Thanks for planning. :)

THIS IS MY JAM

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“ I have an LA face and an Oakland booty.

From Time Out NY’s singles issue

I don’t know what that means, but it sounds fascinating.

(via fatmanatee)

It’s from Baby Got Back, Sir Mix-a-Lot’s song to which I know aaaaall the words - a clear sign of a misspent youth if ever there was one.

(via bingoparaphernalia)

Holy crap do I look like a square right now.

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“ I have an LA face and an Oakland booty.

From Time Out NY’s singles issue

I don’t know what that means, but it sounds fascinating.

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This is the look on my face when the joke falls flat.
This is the look on my face when the joke falls flat.
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This isn’t from the Jersey Shore, but I imagine this scene plays out there too.  It looks like two birds engaged in a mating ritual.
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