There’s another guy who spent two days responding to everyone who posted a pro-Sarkeesian article and telling them to read his important comment on the matter, which just happens to be the longest internet comment I’ve ever seen in my life.
“Saturday, August 23
2 p.m.: Fine, I’ll submit myself to the indignity of breakfast. I’ll eat a … a yogurt. What IS yogurt? Is the yogurt having sex, in my mouth, as I eat it? Is it some sort of dairy orgy? Maybe that’s why the women in the commercials always make such sensual faces as they slide the spoon of demon-curd in and out of their mouths. The yogurt claims to be Greek, but I don’t know why. Perhaps a centaur drizzled honey over it with his tail? That would be Greek as hell.”—THE GRUB STREET DIET: Poet Patricia Lockwood Dreams of Roasted Pturkeydactyls (via unforgettabledetritus)
You know the guy who “accidentally” rapes women? The acquaintance who “misreads” the situation and “goes too far”? The longtime friend who genuinely thought you had consented, and is shocked when you tell him that, no, it was rape? Well, we’re not going to take that guy’s bullshit anymore. Thomas MacAulay Millar over at the […]
(Obviously, TW for rape) So every time someone mentions the idea that men should be taught how not to rape, there’s a chorus of replies about how that’s ridiculous. Here’s one from yesterday, and pretty much the reason I posted Zerlina Maxwell’s article in the first place. There’s a lot of focus on the stranger rapist, the rapist in the shadows, but this is something about the other 2/3’s.
Some them know exactly what they’re doing and some…
If a survey asks men, for example, if they ever “had sexual intercourse with someone, even though they did not want to, because they were too intoxicated (on alcohol or drugs) to resist your sexual advances,” some of them will say yes, as long as the questions don’t use the “R” word.
Now try to figure out who THAT guy is. In my college, he was a fraternity member who threw lots of parties at his house and focused on getting the women drunk and taking them to his room. He probably didn’t think he was doing anything wrong until one woman came forward (he was booted out and after two other incidents, the whole fraternity was banned from campus). This is not an isolated incident.
How do you deal with the rapist who doesn’t know he’s a rapist? You drill it into his head early and often. You focus education efforts starting in high school, and continue into college. You take it to fraternities. You bring family into the discussion. You do this because you’ve spent too much time telling her what to do to avoid rape and not enough telling him to stop shoving drinks in her face, to make sure she gets home safe if she’s had too much to drink, to prevent other men from taking advantage of women. Respect can be taught.