December 2008
If I drive west, can I feasibly celebrate the New...
“Democrats, who speak passionately about the hungry and homeless, personally fork...”
– Nicholas D. Kristof, in Bleeding Heart Tightwads. Kristoff notes charitable-giving research supports Arthur Brooks’ conclusion that liberals are less wiling to put their money where their mouths are. Unsurprisingly, each party’s religious out-give secular fellows; and disproportionately to...
Don't worry Lils, I got it locked down.
Now how the hell do you ever expect that you’ll get laid When all you do is stay in playin’ your computer games?
I chat with hot babes on the internet.
10 best snacks of 2008
In no particular order:
Sun Chips French Onion
Doritos (the spicy flavors)
The Triscuits with the herb crap on it
Ranch Wheat-thins
The peanut butter cup cookies that my boss brings from home
Girl Scouts Thin Mints (the Moses Malone of snacks)
Sliders from everywhere, thank you Lord White Castle for popularizing this treat
My mom’s seven-layer cookie squares
Pretzels in french onion...
2008: A Year Of Not Shutting Up.
daveholmes:
WORD/PHRASE THAT CAME OUT OF NOWHERE AND ALL OF THE SUDDEN EVERYONE STARTED USING IT REAL CASUALLY, AS THOUGH THEY’D BEEN DOING IT FOREVER AND THE WORLD JUST CAUGHT UP:
(TIE) “Shitshow” and “In the tank for.”
WORD THAT CAME OUT OF NOWHERE AND WILL LIKELY BE WITH US FOR A GOOD LONG WHILE, BUT EVEN THE PERSON WHO MADE IT UP PROBABLY FEELS LIKE A DING-DONG WHEN THEY SAY IT:
...
Hopeful athletes, take note...
Visanthe Shiancoe, who will forever be known for getting naked men on the 5:00 news, is apparently pretty good, otherwise. At least, that’s what the announcers were saying yesterday. What they weren’t saying was how the locker room incident may have boosted his confidence. Don’t you think this is something that people would be interested in knowing? Like Al Michaels saying...
conorgriff:
Slider from “Top Gun” has a blog. He misspells Barack.
(You cannot prove one way or the other that I found this out by reading the Daily News’s ‘Top Gun’: Where are they now? slideshow. So there.)
His name is Rick Rossovich, so I’m sure he’s thrilled when he goes to parties and people dedicate the song “Everyday I’m Hustlin’” to him.
A friendly game.
So as not to offend anyone, I present to you all this: more-famous-than-you tumblrs that are worth following even though they have no idea who you are and probably don’t care. They are all very entertaining and have my stamp of approval.
Rob Huebel - Funny guy. Double bonus for being funny on Best Week Ever. Aziz and Paul have tumblrs too, but they post lots of videos and I can’t...
The next time conservatives complain about bad...
I might just bring up the fact that John McCain offered his wife to a bike rally’s equivalent of a Spring break wet t-shirt contest.
Eh, this is probably like picking scabs at this point, but it’s kinda crazy that something like this never got serious press, isn’t it? Pardon me and my grey poupon for not knowing enough about Sturgis, but it just doesn’t seem like it...
The Reading List
I was prepared to just update with something like “go read a book”, because the weeklies seem to be in the same unusual position as other companies, with a twist: whereas many people here get two consecutive three-day weeks, they might go three weeks without an issue. NY Magazine’s front webpage is their restaurant feature, but the current issue shown is the one from a couple of...
It took me one page click to get spazzed out by... →
I dream things that never were and say why not.
icanseenewyorkcityfrommyhouse:
alexbalk:
• Competitive shitting contests. Given the popularity of competitive eating contests, these things must exist, right?
It’s called Tumblr. One step down from a pissing contest.
Yep. Next matchup is after dinner, local time, also includes gratuitous follower listings and “who gets most likes from GPOYW” contests.
Something smells, but I can't locate the source. ...
It’s probably me.
On getting the munchies at your dads house.
tesslynch:
itsbedtime:
jimrock:
I feel it is my unalienable right when staying at my parent’s houses to wait for them to go to bed, get completely trashed and eat stupid amounts of their food. It is my RIGHT goddamnit. They shouldn’t be eating all that junk food anyways, they are old after all. I’m basically doing them a favor when I come downstairs at midnight, giant screwdriver in hand,...
Too many vagina insults on tumblr, not enough...
Why all the metaphors involving women with many sexual partners? Enough already! We already know how her vagina is like a clown car, let’s make fun of dudes.
Yo peen is so wack that they put it on Animal Planet and said it was a new underwater fish species.
Yo ballsack looks like Mickey Rourke’s head before botox.
Yo peen is so ugly, when you have sex, you put a paper bag over it...
“Is your name sprite? cause baby you’d quench my thirst!”
– The worst pick-up line EVER thrown at me. (via lorenrochelle)
You mean THE BEST pickup line ever.
Leftovers from my brain.
I’m amused by the psychology of everyone when it comes to snow. Snow hits Broadway and everyone is in awe of the beauty and this news has to be tumbled. It’s only hours later when people realize that it’s holycrapcold and there aren’t any good sledding hills and your socks just got soaked and you might have hypothermia. Please, next time, let’s get snow in 40...
I love the Decemberists, but I feel like I should...
Dad stuff.
Like father like son: in response to an NBC news report about Caroline Kennedy “ending her silence about the race for Hillary Clinton’s Senate seat”: “ending her silence! pppffffffffffffttttt”
Model of awkwardness: Tracy Morgan on the Late Show, discussing his sex tape with Phyllis Diller, as my dad and I watch. Thank goodness Dave changed the subject. Great...
iPhone owners have sophisticated tastes.
The #1 PAID app for the App Store is iFart Mobile.
I have a new iPod, so if there are any apps I need to be aware of, let me know. Apparently there’s some sort of leveler app out there for free? Where is this!??!? That is good, useful stuff!
LETS MAKE BABIES, SEANBABY.
Everyone loves to delude themselves about how much self-improvement they sneak into their lives. I’ve got some bad news, though. Swimming through triple-cheeseburger drippings to get to your Diet Coke isn’t a healthy meal. Watching pornography in ankle weights isn’t a workout. Conan with French subtitles is not learning a second language, and sticking a baby in front of...
Watchatencio:
It’s here! Please enjoy my 2008 Video Christmas Card. Special thanks to Jason and Bodie for their help. This is also available on youtube. Happy holidays!
It should be noted that this is the most embarassing thing I’ve ever done / made / watched.
On the less serious side, I am flabbergasted by how hysterical this is. FLABBERGASTED.
Also, kudos to Josh Ruben and his gang for his...
Everything Will Be Okay →
atencio:
Watch it.
I’ve been whining about the lack of young filmmakers, of the Kevin Smith type, or anything else, something that resonates with our generation. Lately though, things have been good. What has happened to Patrick is unfortunate, but what he’s giving us now looks like an amazing piece of work.
THIS IS MY SPACE.
NO MATTER HOW MUCH OF A DOUCHEBAG I AM BEING, DON’T YOU DARE CRITICIZE ME.
Watchdreeday:
Here is a video from CHTV that was shot about a year ago, and was trapped in their vault— Mencia proved to be a little powerful than we would think. It’s a parody of the We Are The World video— A bunch of Celebrities get together to sing about an important cause. In this case, it’s Stop Carlos Mencia.
It features awesome cameos from The Whitest Kids U Know , Reggie Watts , ...