i am the fat manatee.

HOT DAMN, I WISH I COULD BOTTLE THIS CILANTRO AND SPRAY IT ON MYSELF AS COLOGNE

Sun, 22 Nov 2009 14:41:25 -0500

I hit the guac jackpot, friends. This is good.

jimrock: This is what I ate for lunch. It is called the Green...

Sun, 22 Nov 2009 14:34:34 -0500

This is what I ate for lunch. It is called the Green Monster and it is chili, jalapenos, cheese and BBQ pork on a bed of waffle fries. Eating it was amazing. BUT. Not to get too into detail, it’s fucking my shit up right now and I want to die. Moral of the story: Don’t live like me.

I WANT TO LIVE LIKE THIS

happycap: Craig Robinson & The Nasty Delicious Comix,...

Sun, 22 Nov 2009 14:05:04 -0500

happycap:

Craig Robinson & The Nasty Delicious

Comix, November 21, 2009

A night of sexy love songs, Eye of the Tiger, a dance battle, and Purple Rain. Musically awesome and hilarious.

The Craig Robinson Experience is a MUST SEE. His MC was also fantastic, and I hope he does some big things in the future, he has that “IT” thing.

Note: not actually called The Craig Robinson Experience.

whydoihaveablog: JGL’s monologue/dance from last night’s...

Sun, 22 Nov 2009 12:43:28 -0500

whydoihaveablog:

JGL’s monologue/dance from last night’s episode of SNL, in case you missed it or want to relive the adorableness. (via sade)

It’s like Joseph Gordon-Levitt knew that one of my Husband Requirements is “knows how to prat fall”. It’s the most dreamboat thing you can do.

And a superb prat fall at that.

When the writers said “Okay, we need someone to play Hu...

Sun, 22 Nov 2009 12:10:26 -0500

When the writers said “Okay, we need someone to play Hu Jintao”, Will Forte drew the short straw.

playerspulse: gamefreaksnz: Super Mario Castle Theme Death...

Sat, 21 Nov 2009 19:58:21 -0500

playerspulse:

gamefreaksnz:

Super Mario Castle Theme Death Metal!

\m/

This is actually pretty cool.

RROOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRR

It’s tough to see, but the plain pizza is called...

Sat, 21 Nov 2009 19:51:11 -0500

It’s tough to see, but the plain pizza is called “The Mild”… of COURSE that’s David Wright’s picture.

I had Two Boots for the first time last night, and it was amazing. Any time a pizza place can pair up Abita with a Bayou-style pizza, I am totally on board.

Kay isn’t the only one with T-Rex arms. This is a SMALL...

Sat, 21 Nov 2009 18:31:46 -0500

Kay isn’t the only one with T-Rex arms. This is a SMALL jacket, and it still isn’t happening. BLEGH.

(Zoe, you need to get this t-shirt)

Harry Truman’s face is on a hockey jersey.

Sat, 21 Nov 2009 17:23:42 -0500

Harry Truman’s face is on a hockey jersey.

sade: OMG a Tumblr was on Jimmy Fallon last night! Could he get...

Sat, 21 Nov 2009 16:51:08 -0500

sade:

OMG a Tumblr was on Jimmy Fallon last night!

Could he get a little cuter? Impossible.

The guy I copy my style from also has the suit I want and is way more charismatic than me. PFFFT.

lauraenoughalready: yea, im onboard with this !!!

Sat, 21 Nov 2009 12:00:56 -0500

lauraenoughalready:

yea, im onboard with this

!!!

Our government failed us.

Fri, 20 Nov 2009 18:39:58 -0500

jayparkinsonmd:

Imagine how happy you must feel if you’re an insurance executive watching premiums rise for decades at three times the rate of everything else knowing that in less than a decade your product will only be affordable to the wealthy and, now, the government has mandated that their citizens purchase your product.

Epic win.

When you are in a bad mood, just watch this video on repeat.

Fri, 20 Nov 2009 18:13:06 -0500

When you are in a bad mood, just watch this video on repeat.

This month’s GQ has some pretty rad photos. I’m...

Fri, 20 Nov 2009 16:57:07 -0500

This month’s GQ has some pretty rad photos. I’m also too lazy to go to my scanner.

Addendum

Fri, 20 Nov 2009 16:39:28 -0500

stryker:

Having spent the last week playing socialite with Nick Douglas, I can confirm that New York’s young elite can be almost as “frothing, inward and inbred” as any rural community I’ve encountered. Everyone reads the same magazines, watches the same TV, reads the same blogs, etc.

I absolutely prefer it to Palinland culture, but there definitely is an insularity here that mirrors the farmer’s contentment to never explore the world further out than the county fair.

I can’t stand the insularity of that culture.

Angry Crowd Boos Palin After Her Signing Hand Falls Off and She...

Fri, 20 Nov 2009 16:23:18 -0500

Angry Crowd Boos Palin After Her Signing Hand Falls Off and She Leaves Book Signing

Hey guys, I’ll tell you what. I’m having a Palin signature stamp made up, and I’ll sit in for Sarah. I’ll even dress up in drag, I’ll take pictures with you, stamp your book, and it’ll be way more fun than standing in line for three hours so you can gawk at your favorite celebrity for two seconds.

(vid via buzzfeed)

Larry King, making my day every day.

Fri, 20 Nov 2009 14:12:26 -0500

Larry King, making my day every day.

GQ PARTY HOMIES

Fri, 20 Nov 2009 14:00:06 -0500

GQ PARTY HOMIES

Urban elitist comments make me smile

Fri, 20 Nov 2009 13:53:14 -0500

absurdlakefront:

I love this comment found on Gawker’s story about Fox News being obsessed with commenting on Jon Stewart despite the Daily Show not being a news program.

I’ve been watching all this Palin craziness over the past few days with probably too much fervor, but I’ve learned one really interesting thing:

It’s completely OK to call people who trend toward the Left ‘East Coast elites’, and godless, and selfish, and out of touch, and mean, and snide, and (gulp) educated, and non-Americans. This kind of mass character assassination goes without question. But the minute anyone assesses ol’ Prudhoe Bay Barbie based on her geoographic and, gulp, educational status, it’s all vicious attack and slander.

And you know what? That’s OK. Because we educated, forward-thinking, urban folks have already won.We won a lonnnnggg time ago. We’re on the top of the hill. So it is probably pretty petty to lob insults down at the lowly shufflers too up their own asses to try and improve upon their own willful idiocy. We’ll always read more books, see more plays, watch better TV, have bigger ideas, engage in more interesting conversation, meet more diverse people. We’ll always die with a far greater wealth of stories and experiences than Palin’s frothing, inward, inbred cult ever will. We’re better at being alive. Plain and simple.

And of course there are people who do lead ‘regular’ and totally fulfilling lives in ‘Middle America’ with genuine class and smarts and integrity. It’s just that those folks don’t worry about these silly comparisons. They understand the spectrum of America, they’re content with their lives and their choices. And bully to them! They are not the Urban Elites’ enemy in the slightest.

It’s these jealous, grasping simpletons who constantly complain about ‘libtards’ and their wine-swilling who we really ought to fear, but ultimately pity. What disappointments their lives must be. How embarrassed they must be by their own circumstances to keep tossing dog shit over the fence into the greener grass.

Sure we’ll get angry at these fools when they say “Liberals are more likely to abort fetuses with Down Syndrome”, but we really should mostly be pitying them. Because it’s the only emotion they merit. And it’s what irks them the most. And that’s kind of fun.

Us: 1, Them: 0. Forever.

Productive to the political debate? Probably not, but I have to say I agree with the sentiment. Is it elitist, and belying a great sense of privelege and entitlement? Yes, but I’ve worked my entire life at escaping a mindless world of conservative American mediocrity. When pressed I have to admit that I really do not hold a lot of hate or anger toward people, but I very often feel a lot of pity. This is not a good thing. Pity is inherently condescending and can only exist when one feels superior to another, and that pity can absolutely enrage people. I think the reason why educated, intelligent, and rational people people shun (unless they are making money off of them) Palin, Beck, is because they playing up a fantasy where we are meant to be pitied. The best thing one can do in any argument is grow dismissive and calmer during an argument to make your opponents feel small and petty.

Like Mr. T I pity the fool (Mr. T is apparently much deeper than I had previously conceived, haha).

I feel a sense of duty or camaraderie to those who have hope, want to grow, and want to learn. Sympathy is for people who unable to help themselves due to circumstances they cannot control. Pity is for those that completely refuse or have given up on learning, growing, or improving themselves and world around them. Pity is for the ignoble. I clearly need to work on avoiding the seduction of feeling superior through pity…

I have to take issue with the whole thing about The Daily Show being fake or funny or don’t take it seriously, because under the veneer of humor, it IS serious. Their work is intense and requires hours upon hours of watching other networks, no matter how terrible, fact checking, researching, analyzing, etc… because they know they have to get it right every time. In terms of news analysis, they’re as good as any “serious” source. When Stewart backed off on some criticism awhile ago with the excuse that he’s doing comedy, I thought it was a copout, because a lot of what he does has tremendous value. I think he knows better now.

Who was it, Brian Williams, who said that they bailed on a puff piece because they knew Stewart would skewer it? And that 25 minute talk with Lou Dobbs, which more than likely ended up being way more valuable than any of Dobbs’ other cable visits*? How the hell does that happen?

If Stewart wanted to anchor a Sunday morning debate program right now, he could take it. He probably should, and it’s something to keep in mind if he gets bored of The Daily Show in its current incarnation.

*I’m picturing Dobbs and O’Reilly pontificating on how terrible the extreme Marxist left media is and playing grab ass right now. Awesome.

This was the look on my face when I was reading an article on...

Fri, 20 Nov 2009 12:29:00 -0500

This was the look on my face when I was reading an article on Nouriel Roubini (the guy who predicted the credit crunch) and there was a picture with him and a loathsome Web 2.0 attention whore.